Monday, 3 October 2011

Close Encounters of the Sluggy Kind....

S was at a trade fair in the NEC Birmingham all last week. He phoned every night to let us know how he was. Hilarious moment on Thursday when he told us that he and his work colleagues had been refused entry into a bar in Birmingham city centre because they were 'too old'.

Strangely enough every time he goes away we seem to be attacked by a kitchen invasion of slugs. The past few days I have spied their snotty little trails across my back door mat and have known we have the little sods infiltrating our four walls yet again. Ever since I witnessed Ron Weasley boaking them into a bucket in a Harry Potter film my phobia has increased. Last time one was sticking to a can of beans when I lifted it out the cupboard - cue more screaming than a viewing of the Exorcist. My heart fell into my Crocs when I realised they were back. S is away again tonight and as I waltzed into the kitchen  I spied one basking on the door mat. They don't go anywhere else. Just that mat. Or at least I hope they don't go anywhere else. I realised to my glee that I could lift the mat and chuck it out the back door. No slug contact what so ever.  That was until I saw it's big brother sliding under the washing machine. A brown stripy one as well. I so hate them,  they scare the s**t out of me even more than the black ones do. Brown Stripy obviously felt the thundering vibrations of me crossing the floor and decided to get a jog on and made a slide for refuge under the washing machine. I have never seen a slug move so fast! It drew it's tail in leaving me wanting to boak. They are obviously slithering in from under the sink. I decided desperate measures were needed and in an effort to keep the kitchen a human domain grabbed the salt pot and laid a trail round the front of the washing machine. Now I am terrified to go downstairs tomorrow in case I find the kitchen littered with slug remains which I am going to have to dispose of.........