Saturday, 8 October 2011

Robbie Rotten.....

You know when you really have a fantastic social life when your choice for a Friday night is a Donkey Derby at the Scout Hut or an alleged Robbie Williams Tribute night at the Doo Club. (Pigeon Club for those of you not familiar with Scots dialect.)  I did something I never usually do - I went to both. The Donkey Derby,  because I felt guilty about not supporting the Scouts and it was actually a good night. The kids had a whale of a time and H was in raptures as the only prizes being given out were sweeties.

As a result of my conscience I ended up arriving at the Robbie thing an hour and a half after it started to be met by an orange entity warbling 'Angels'. Robbie Williams! Aye maybe if I was blind and he was a hundred yards away with a bag over his head. Good grief. I actually couldn't watch, but as usual I couldn't not either. He was a guy of about fifty trying to pass himself off as Robbie. If Robbie Williams had witnessed him he would have called Trading Standards.  It was grim to say the least. He had died his hair jet black and styled in what he thought was a Robbie quiff,  but actually was more Robbie Rotten from Lazy Town. Add that to the most naff stage outfits ever and the result was cringe worthy. I sat silently praying that he wouldn't do 'Rock DJ' and strip off to his lion print kecks. To further add insult to injury, they didn't stock the only alcoholic beverage that I drink so I sat there nursing a cola and watching a leggy dame dancing about in a play suit that was just about decent if she didn't bend over. She did - to pick up Robbie Rotten's tambourine. The guys in the room must have thought that worth the six quid ticket price alone.  I sat praying for an opportune moment to sneak out as it was too loud to hold a decent conversation. I must be getting old.......

Finally took myself off just before midnight and fell into bed a millisecond after I arrived home. As I dropped off I reflected on the evening and realised that I had actually enjoyed the Scouts' thing best.......oh dear...